"Jesus Loves the Little Children of the World"

Isn't that a wonderful song. I was just rocking my baby to sleep while singing it to her. As she was closing her eyes I began to think of all the things I have to do today. Vacuum, tend to the massive pile of laundry (washing machine has been broken), clean our master bathroom, take the dog to the vet and a million little things between. But not ONE of those thoughts was to sit down and write in my blog. Until I finished that song. Then it just came over me that I had to sit down and write down my thoughts.


"Jesus loves the little children,
all the children in the world.
Red and yellow, black and white
All are precious in his sight,
Jesus loves the little children of the world"


Cute song, right? It's easy to imagine Jesus loving all the little children of the world. They are just adorable. They say some of the sweetest things, and lets face it they all have a carefree attitude we wish we could go back to! But guess what.


John 1:12 "Yet to all who did receive him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God"


I know you've probably know that we are all Children of God. But have you ever REALLY thought about it?


Example: I was talking to a friend once and she was talking about playing at the beach with her dad. She said no matter how far he took her out into the water she felt like nothing could happen to her. No sharks, no going under, no slimy fish, NOTHING. However, if something did happen to her then she knew her daddy would make it better. He would comfort her, give her what she needed to feel better. Isn't that thought awesome. As children we look up to our parents. We think that as long as we do the best we can our parents will help fill in the rest. Do you ever think about the days of being a child and being so carefree? Do you ever miss those days? Honestly, I think if we rely on God we can have that attitude again. I mean I know we have more responsibilities, more stress, more EVERYTHING. But we did as kids too? Homework, colleges, chores, jobs. But as children we knew that as long as we were REALLY trying someone would help pick us up if we were having problems with any of our responsibilities. We knew our parents were there for us, and if not parents our grandparents, our teachers, our friends, most everyone had SOMEONE that we can depend on to help us up.


Now we are grown up. We have to keep ourselves and our families afloat. We feel we cannot have the carefree attitudes we did as children. But WE CAN. We have God. If we can trust God and look up to him as we look up to our parents when we were children then he will back us up. If we fall he will catch us, when we need help he will help us. When we need advice on life, jobs, friends loved ones, all we have to do is pray and he will give it to us. Isn't that wonderful? To remember that someone will ALWAYS fix my shortcomings is such a comforting thought. It may not be how I want it fixed, and I may not understand, but looking back I will know that God had his hand in it every step of the way.


In theory it should be a "Duh" kind of thought. Of course we are supposed to trust God over our parents. After all, our parents are sinners just like we are, our parents aren't perfect, our parents can't protect us from the world, they will do everything they can to protect us, but as a human they will never be able to take care of us like God can.


Then why is it so easy to look up to our parents, but it takes so much more to look up to God? I guess the answer for that is different for every person. For me, it's because I'm such a RIGHT NOW kind of person. I like to hear the answer, set up solutions, make a plan. With God, it's not always that direct. Don't get me wrong, sometimes it is. Sometimes God hits me in the face with an answer and I can't help but laugh at how direct the answer was. But others it takes time, patience, and most of all FAITH.


I guess this long passage is to just say God calls us his children, so lets act like his children. Let us look up to God as we looked up to our parents. Do your best at everything you do and then when you have a shortcoming, God will pick you up. But we just have to trust him like a little girl who trusts her daddy. God will protect us from going under, from the sharks and all the slimy fish. We just have to pray and seek God's answers and guidance. After all:


Matthew 18:3 and said, "Truly I say to you, unless you are converted and become like children, you will not enter the kingdom of heaven.…

It's been a while.

Sigh. I haven't posted on here in a while. And I'm not happy about it. The truth it I feel like I'm at a point in my faith where I'm not growing, I'm just stuck. And I really think that faith is something you should constantly grow in. I haven't been to church in two weeks. But I do still read my Bible everynight. I just finished reading a series of passages about Jesus right before he was cruisified. It was really interesting. So I guess by reading every night and reading new passages I am still growing since I'm learning. I guess I'm just not excited about it as I was before. Don't get me wrong, I am SO happy that I'm trying to live a better life, but the new has worn off. The Bible constantly refers to God's relationship as a marriage. And I guess with every marriage (even with the man himself) the new wears off. And just like any marriage, I do believe this is a test. With the new and excitment wearing off I'm not giving up. I may drag a little, but it won't last. I just have to find my niche. So I want to encrouage you to do the same. Remember that just because it takes more effort than it did before, that you CANNOT give up. Make it past the hump and things will be smooth again. I'll be sure to let you all know when I'm past mine!

Let Go & Let God

We've made it to church the past 2 Sunday's in a row, and are planning on going this coming Sunday! (GO US!). I feel a lot better about all this when I do go, and I really enjoy it! Ethan stayed in the nursery the entire time, so I hope he does good this Sunday too! That is the main reason why we don't go, becuase usually they're calling us out to go get him!

I feel like I'm doing better on my journey to become a better Christian. Its becoming more automatic than it has been for me in the past. Simple things that aren't that big of a deal, but make a huge difference are becoming where I don't have to THINK about what I'm doing I automatically make the decision I think God would like without even realizing it. And to be honest, I kinda like it. No, I really like it. It makes it easier to know right from wrong. If I see/hear something that makes me uncomfortable at first I think "UGH". But then I get a tiny little warmness in my heart and I think that things like that would not have bothered me a year ago at this time. So even though you may struggle with things just make little tiny steps and they WILL add up.

I think the biggest things that I (and everyone else) needs to remember is God has a plan. Don't fight it. Let things happen. That's my biggest thing. Not to worry. Becuase it is true, there's not point in worring about tomorrow becuase it just takes away from today. And that is the biggest thing I have issues with. I'm a control freak, I HAVE to be in control. And thinking that there is a plan for me that is not in my control is really hard. But then I think of how amazing this plan will be and I work hard to let go. Actually, I do have control on God's plan, I can control wheather I go with it, or fight it with my own plan. And really and truly my own plan's never seem to work out lol. Let go, and let God. The simplest phrase that I have the hardest time to go by. I really want to though. So all my readers out there. Today I ask you, to Let go and let God.

False Impressions...

Went to church today for the first time in a while. I really do enjoy going. I can tell that is something that has really chang in me. I enjoy going to chuch! Now if only I can get my son to enjoy going instead of screaming the entire time we would be doing good.

I really enjoyed the message: Christ in You. The preacher talked about what it means to have Christ in you. He even recalled the moment when he let Christ in his heart. He told us the exact day and circumstances in which he completley turned around and began to live just for God. Even though I agreed with most everything he said. It didn't happen like that for me.

You hear the stories about how people give their life to God and then on that day everything changed. That is unrealastic for me. Do not get me wrong, I do know people who were saved and then on that very day their life turned around. But I really don't think its like that for everyone. I believe that ONLY hearing stories like that could give someone a false impression.  Think about the people who are new at all this. Then they try to give their heart to God but then it seems as if nothing as changed. How will they know they're not doing it wrong? I will say I haven't even thought I was doing it wrong but I have wondered WHY i didn't feel different. And I do know, giving your life to God is a commitment where YOU have to do the changing. But from the stories I've heard it leaves an impression of a 180 degree turn around that very day. So I want to share with you all how I gave my heart away:

I PRAYED. It didn't happen all in one day. Not even close. I had Ethan. And I was having some kind of PTSD (not the full montey, but something was out of wack) and I was anxious, scared nervous. So I prayed. I've always prayed. I've always known of God: I was saved when I was 13 and grew up going to church. So this was nothing new. But then I decided I couldn't expect God to help me if I wasn't helping him. So I decided to start looking on how I can do more for him. So I began to read the Bible. By reading I asked question and God started bluntly answering them. When I began to see God answering my questions I put more trust in him. When I was scared/nervous/anxious I comforted myself with his words, and I prayed. And ya know what: it worked. Then I started trying to be a better person (and I'm still trying) and then one day I think about the person I am and I think "Wow, when did that happen." So you see, it wasn't a one day change for me. It was a slow change. It took time, and heck, I'm even still trying. But that's the point: I AM TRYING. And that's what matters right? You try to live through God. And that is what EVERYONE does. No one is perfect. EVERYONE makes mistakes (sins). The more you try the better you'll be. And one day you'll say oh wow, I've changed.

So, no, I didn't make this huge turn around all in one day. But I did change. I still am. So even if you are looking at turning things over to God 100% and are skeptical, THAT IS OKAY! Read the Bible, Ask questions, he'll answer them. Trust him, he'll comfort you. It won't happen all in one day (or ya never know, it might) but don't expect to say a prayer and *BAM* every thing is different. But say a prayer and attmept to change. Like my dad has always told me once you get your mind right, your ass follows. And I beleive it. Once you get one tincey part of your mind on God the rest of yourself will follow. It is the biggest and best change you'll ever make in you life.

I'm pretty proud of the person I am. I know I have flaws, and I know I need to do more. But I am proud that I realize this stuff. And I realize it enough to try to correct myself, and push myself along.

So those are my thoughts for today. I have never thought about any of this until today when I heard the preacher talking. But when I started thinking about it I realized that its the truth. Its not a one day turn around. It takes one day to begin, but it takes a lifetime to prove yourself.

Jibber Jabber....

Not much to say today, but I feel like I'm going behind on my once a week post and I feel like its time to post.

Book Review:
I just read my So-Called Life as a Proverbs 31 Wife by Sara Horn. I highly suggest it. ESPECIALLY if you're trying to be a homemaker. It does get slow at points but its still a great read. She does many different ministries for military wives (I'm hopefully going to one of her retreats in May!!). But when you see these people up there you seem to think they have some kind of super powers. Okay maybe not super powers, but it just seems like they have it all, and they can do it all. I mean I know nothing is perfect but seeing the people preach about their lives and how they've been touched by God. I mean I can't really help to think that their lives must be pretty smooth. Well, deep down I know better (I don't want anyone reading to take offense) but really, its easy to think like that. But in this book Sara has a husband who had been laid off, and she had never been a 'homemaker'. In the beginning she decides that she's going to try to be like the wife mentioned in Psalms 31. She talks of all their struggles, and her struggles with juggling her ministries, her writings, her husband's joblessness, being a mom, AND taking on Proverbs. I kind of went into reading is skeptically thinking that she was going to make this miraculous turn around and become this wonderful homemaker (predictable). But it wasn't like that at all. You have to read it. There is a turn around, but not as predictable as you would originally think. And this makes me even MORE excited to see her at the retreat. I can hear her preach about how wonderful God is and then KNOW that she has had hardships, she has struggled to juggle God, job, and a family. I cannot wait. So yes READ IT.


Whats going on with my resolution:

Mind: Read 3 of my 52 books so far. Doing good in school, too, but its just an intro class so nothing is too stressful so far!

Body: Ummm..... Stay Tuned :-)

Soul: Yes, the only thing that REALLY matters. A radio station here called K-Love is having a 30-Day Challenge, only listen to Christian music for 30 days. So far I'm doing pretty good. If you have Direct TV the channel 826 "The Praise" is a more contemporary Christian music station, I leave it playing pretty much all day!
As for my volunteering, I filled out another application and emailed a lady on Camp Lejeune but still no replies. I'm going to have to find more resources!
I'm still reading my Bible every night. I'm doing the 'moment with scripture' plan that is on my phone. I wish it was more of a study, so after I read it I can read something that can explain it better. But I get most of it. And I think I've pretty much read it every night (right now I can't think of a time I skipped) so YAY ME!

A Baby Came... And Everything Changed!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!


So I haven't quite made my one post a week goal!! The Holidays are easy to get lost in! A lot has happened since last post so I'll try to update as much as I can remember!


First and fore most I did THE DEED. Yes, I did it. When they did the invitation at church I raised my hand, said the prayer and did the walk where everyone can see that you just officially gave you heart to God. I've been so back and fourth for SO long about doing this. But like someone said, there's nothing wrong with being SURE! I mean I have always believed in God. I was saved when I was 13. Never Baptized (I need to find a home church and get on that), but let's face it. A LOT has happened since I was 13. I have always professed to be saved. But ya know when its been a while and they're doing the invite I always felt ify. I always tell myself 'I'm already saved', or 'its between me and God so walking up and showing it to everyone isn't THAT big of a deal,' (because lets face it, I am a shy kinda person), but since I had to convince myself NOT to do it was all the more reason TO do it. And I'm SO glad that I did. But just be forewarned, when they act like SO many people raised their hands (ya know everyone eyes are supposed to be closed and heads are supposed to down) there AREN'T THAT many lol. I was the only one that took the walk! Kinda made me laugh. But I am GLAD that I did.


That same night at church during the service I could see between the curtains; like off to the side of the stage. It was the Christmas service so mostly music and one of the singers (Jon LLoyd to be exact -check him out-) was standing back there waiting for his turn to come on stage while another guy was singing. And back there all by himself he had his hand in the air and his eyes closed, praising God. There was something about that moment seeing him so deep praise, so deep in the song that he is back there with his hands up in the air all by his lonesome was so touching for me. I don't know, I guess you had to be there. It was like him and I had a moment and he knew nothing about it lol. I guess I always put the 'hand raising' something you do at church (I know, I know, you should worship EVERYDAY) but honestly, I think I've only seen it at church. And seeing him doing that back there by himself, made me want to work harder to get to a point so I can do that. It made me even MORE excited to say that prayer and walk up there. So Thank you Jon LLoyd.


Every Year for Christmas we get together with my Grandparents, Aunts, Uncle, and cousins and we always do a present exchange. This year they changed the swap a little bit, instead of drawing names just bring a present and we'd do a swap. Well it wasn't until THE DAY BEFORE that I was informed that we aren't doing a swap, and frankly, I was kinda upset. A) Because no one bothered to tell me B) Because I had already bought a gift and C) because that meant I wasn't getting anything Christmas eve. Well then I get a BIG OLE SLAP IN THE FACE -Yes, we all need one sometimes and this one was FOR SURE needed and I believe straight from the big man himself-. The night before Christmas Eve I wake up at one A.M. PUKING MY BRAINS OUT. Even better, my darling husband starts at it right after me. We felt HORRIBLE. Puked ALL night. Felt like crap, didn't sleep. Mema came and got Ethan when he woke up so hopefully he wouldn't get it. We got out of up like 2 times all day and that was to lay on the couch and then back to the bed. They were planning on having our Christmas dinner at 5. Well at 3 my fever was so bad my face felt sun burnt. I was almost in tears thinking about how one of the few times my entire family gets together every year I was in bed sick. I wasn't worried about missing the presents, or even the food for that matter, but I was worried about missing my FAMILY. And celebrating the birth of Jesus with them. Luckily, mom came home, gave me meds and that perked me up (not 100%) enough to go spend the rest of the evening with them. THANK GOD. Not just for healing me enough to go, but for showing me how to pay attention to what REALLY matters. Which I know that Christmas is more about family than anything else, but I got WAY more upset than I should have. So knowing it and FEELING it are two different things. 


And check out this Video -CLICK HERE- it makes me CRY.


Merry Christmas to all and to All a good night. I LOVE YOU GUYS!!

Quick Post!

It's late! I've had a long evening. Getting groceries at 8:00pm will wear someone out! But I'm winding down, nothing on T.V. I was getting ready to go to bed and read the Bible but I decied to make a post since I'm doing this!

Random Thought:

I don't want to just read the bible I want to STUDY it. I realized that I learned more in my 5 week Old Testament class about the Bible than I've ever learned about the Bible. We didn't just look at one verse, or one instance, we learned about how each story connected with the other, and so much more. But it was A LOT of work to do in 5 weeks, so I will admit that I did half-ass it. So I didn't learn nearly as much as I wish I did. Now I wish I wouldn't have sold the book. I need to find a new one! 

Someone reading this sent me the link to this blog -The Worst Missionary Ever- <-- Click there. And I must say it is pretty awesome. I hope I can get to that point! She obviously is very self aware and has found herself. I don't know, I just love it! She is a Christian who didn't change who she is. Now I know changes need to be made to really follow the right path, but she is still her. -Well I'm guessing, I didn't know her before. Haha. But just read! 

I think I'm going to do my reading tonight all snuggled up in bed. I'll share more on here when I can. Good night! Love you all!